2010: The Year We Stay Home

Sadly, The moon will no longer be recieving its Swine Flu jab.

If you happen to be a regular reader of Tech (or this blog if you don’t read the Student), you may have noticed we have been keepign a close eye on the Constellation Project; NASA’s construction of a new fleet of rockets to replace the ageing space shuttles, with the eventual prospect of maybe, perhaps, if you’re really good and eat all your vegetables and go to bed when you’re supposed to, returning to the moon. However, should Barrack Obama’s 2011 budget request pass through Congress without any hitches, the entire program will be cancelled.

Obama’s reasoning for scrapping the program is that it is massively over budget and massively behind schedule, now posited for completion in 2013 with the space shuttles due for retirement at the end of this year. His decision has brought considerable criticism, one Republican Senator claiming “NASA will no longer be an agency of innovation and hard science, it will be the agency of pipe dreams and fairy tales.”
Frankly though, Constellation was a dubious concept from the start, especially in terms of innovation.The program began back in 2004 under the supervision of George W. Bush, which is hardly the most auspicious of starts for anything more technologically advanced than a paper aeroplane. Of course, such a statement would be misplaced if the Ares I was going to change the face of space travel. It wasn’t. The design of Ares I was based (read: almost identical to) the Saturn V rocket which shot Neil Armstrong & co into orbit in 1969. So this sparkling new interstellar technology was forty years old before it had even been built.

This design decision may appear odd, but it doesn’t seem so strange when you look at events prior to the announcement. In 2003 the Columbia space shuttle disintegrated on re-entry into Earth’s atmosphere. The Constellation program was a knee-jerk reaction to this unfortunate event, a quick fix to replace the shuttles and prevent any further disasters. Six years on with the program nowhere near complete and the fix no longer seems so quick.

Obama’s proposed alternative to the Constellation program involves a $500 million incentive for the private sector to create a more efficient means of space travel than strapping seven men and women to an enormous and highly temperamental bomb. Concepts include placing fuel depots in space ahead of the rocket and so reduce the size of rockets on lift off, or putting further research into ion engines, which eject positive ions to gradually propel a spacecraft forward. Additionally, significant sums will be put into creating robotic probes, which are the most effective (if least exciting) method of exploring the solar system at present.

However, in terms of actual objectives Obama’s budget request is rather vague, and while I agree that  a rerun of the sixties’ Moon landings is not the best way forward, a more permanent residence on the moon is the next sensible step towards humans traversing the solar system. Furthermore, after so long, a return to the Moon in any form will almost certainly provide a huge boost in popular interest for NASA.

Perhaps though, the future of human space explorations lies not with the US. China put their first human into space in 2003, and India plan to do the same in 2016. While both are a long way off overtaking NASA as the dominant space exploration agency, they could well be on their way by the time NASA have another coherent program of events. On the other hand, Obama’s decision could well be the kick up the backside that NASA needed, and we’ll be zipping around the Moon on space-skis in no time.

Recently, Time magazine published their online list of the fifty best inventions of 2009. Of course, lists such as these are always utterly pointless and arbitrary, but they inevitably contain some ridiculous ordering and consequently make superb lampooning material for an equally pointless and arbitrary column like the one you’re reading right now.

Heading the list was NASA’s Ares I rocket, the revolutionary new spacecraft designed to take astronauts to the moon and possibly beyond. Did I say revolutionary? I do apologise, I of course meant “regurgitation of a thirty-year-old design,” since Ares I is pretty much an anorexic version of the seventies’s interstellar headliner Saturn V, which makes it a bizarre choice for the No. 1 spot.

Further controversy was to be had as Microsoft’s Project Natal technology, which allows computer games to be controlled entirely by human voice and action, was several places above a new AIDS vaccine that actually works (albeit only 31% of the time). Surely, though, that’s a more important invention than being able to seduce a weird-looking virtual child called Milo without the dubious aid of a Wii wand.

However, I’m willing to forgive Time’s questionable charting abilities, simply because they included a robotic penguin on the list, which, frankly, makes them awesome.

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Space used to be so exciting. Firing random animals into the ether just to see what would happen, encasing a bunch of humans into a glorified tin can with an enormous bomb attached to the bottom and less computing power than a mobile phone.  As morally questionable as many of the actions of the Space Race may have been, at least it was interesting.

Half a century onward, and space is boring. For the past decade the only truly newsworthy occurence was the completion of the International Space Station or, as I prefer to think of it, the International Space Hotel for people so ridiculously wealthy they could build their own full-size rocket out of fifty-pound notes and their bank manager wouldn’t notice. Earlier this year Buzz Aldrin criticised NASA’s current agenda, in particular the creation of the manned rocket Ares I and spacecraft Orion I, both of which will take five years to build and take us no further than the moon, where we’ve already been. One small step for a man, one  giant retread of the same bloody ground for mankind.

However, last Friday the current tide of tedium in interstellar activity seemed to change as NASA put into effect their latest plan: to determine whether or not water-ice exists under the lunar surface. Now I know this sounds about as interesting as watching crocodiles evolve, but the method by which this experiment was undertaken was actually quite fascinating.  In order to penetrate beneath the lunar surface, NASA deliberately crashed a rocket and a satellite into the moon’s Cabeus crater. Brilliant, eh?

Unfortunately, no. While theoretically the crash was supposed to cause a dust-cloud large enough to be visible from Earth with a common telescope, nobody saw anything. Why? Because the crater absorbed the dust cloud.  Genius. Also, as NASA didn’t exactly go out of their way to publicise the event, no one was watching. Maybe this had something to do with the fact the satellite and rocket cost £79 million to make, £79 million which literally went up in smoke (and dust). Not that it really matters because nobody saw either.

Maybe I’m being a little harsh. Reports from NASA say that while the event was by no means spectacular,  they have gained enough examinable data to make the mission worthwhile. I wish they had gone to a bit more effort in recording the event than effectively sellotaping a crap webcam to the side of the rocket.  Frankly, by now we should have such things in sodding HD.

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